But when it comes to relationships, I do seek secure relationships that are clearly defined. Jessie brought me a little care package of stuff to jokingly get me through the next 40 days. I wanted to honor our project together with something lighthearted. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? The play is about a bunch of college students going to parties, getting drunk, having sex, and their complicated interpersonal relationships.
I know I should relax and open myself up to vulnerability, so I can learn to enjoy dating more in the future. Tim insisted on being a gentleman and paying for dinner, which was very sweet of him, but I want to get the next one. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? I know I don’t have as much savings as he does, but I’ve always supported myself financially, and I don’t mind spending on great experiences. I was wondering the whole time during therapy, “Wait, why are we doing this?! I was thinking about some of my buddies who are in a relationship that doesn’t completely stimulate them. The characters are either opportunistic, self-serving, entitled, indulgent, or power-seeking.
To the average person, thanks to bad press and other contributing factors, online dating has become somewhat of an un-trusted source for meeting people.
So why are we different here at Free Dating America?
I went out with a girl last night, as sort of a ‘swan song’ for my single-hood. Life passes by so quickly, and I like having an hour a week to reflect in an attempt to learn and grow from it all. The psychologist brought up many topics we wouldn’t have talked about on our own. After this is met (around $50,000 to $70,000 per year for a family), an increase in salary does not positively increase a person’s happiness. Tim seems extremely overwhelmed by the idea of having to see me every day for this project. I become extremely invested in people and things that I care about, which can cause me to fall for someone quickly. While sexual desire exists to make sure we pop out babies, the feelings of love exists to promote bonding and pairing between mates to increase the survival rate of the children. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? Tim seemed slightly annoyed that I missed his text messages before the play. And what’s with the new “read on xx” timestamp on the i Phone? I just wanted to stay in and watch the Knicks game. Then I felt like I was doing it wrong, like I should be giving all my attention to her. Good thing I brought some surprise candies to keep us busy.
Well, she and I ended up talking about this Forty Days of Dating project the entire time. She asked us straight away if Tim and I were attracted to each other. He almost had a panic attack when I sent him a list of date ideas for the next week! Love is not a matter of the heart, it’s all in our brain. I think it was a bit soon for this, but our therapist Jocelyn wanted to have a consultation first. Jocelyn hit us with a TON of questions that I’m not sure either of us were prepared to talk about so quickly with her: 1. It was cute that Tim insisted on being a gentleman and walking me home after the play. How much does it suck to see someone read your text and then they don’t write back? However, Jessie and I have something planned on Sunday, so it was probably best to do a date tonight instead of Saturday night. The things you learn about someone that you think you know. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? Tonight was the first time things felt date-y and I felt okay about it.
The new Justin Timberlake album came out yesterday and it’s totally got me in the mood … I don’t place value on the size of someone’s bank account or material possessions. ” As Jocelyn said today, “emotions know no project boundaries.” Is there anything that you want to do differently? I was texting with one of my best friends, Greg in Chicago, and he told me to just have fun with it. So many men and women accept this standard, it’s no wonder why half of all marriages end in divorce. Tim found it difficult to empathize with any of the characters in the play as there was no “hero” character. After the play, we wandered over to a bar nearby in the West Village for a drink.
But really, Jessie and I should share a “JT” logo with him. I’ve been in relationships with guys both rich and poor, and a guys wealth does not interest me. Are we so desperate for companionship that we’ll compromise our happiness? I found the complicated dynamic of these different personalities to be an interesting twist on the usual character development. Tim told me about his last serious relationship with a girl he dated in San Francisco when he worked for Apple. Things were getting serious between them when she had to leave for business for a few months. One part of the play stirred up emotions from something that happened in my past.
She then asked why we’ve never tried dating in the four years we’ve known each other. He’s not at a place in his life where he wants to settle down. In fact, research shows brain activity in love is almost identical to our brain activity on cocaine. When someone does that, your natural inclination is to tell them something extremely private back. I just listened and asked a couple of questions, and let her talk.
Since the rise of online dating over the past decade, many dating websites have come and gone.
Anyway, I feel like there was definitely a moment last night when we both said to ourselves, “Damn, are we actually doing this?! We went to our first couples therapy session together. He’s afraid of his commitment issues and doesn’t want to hurt me since he respects me. I learned early on that money does not make me happy. In therapy we talked about how I am extremely picky about who I date. I’ve wondered where the feelings actually come from, so I did some reading about it tonight. The play paints a pretty bleak picture of Americans in “Generation Me.” Maybe slightly ironic in the context of this project . The long distance scared him, and he broke off the relationship when she got back. I was slightly shaken up after the play so I told Tim about it to explain why I was acting strangely.
” Is there anything that you want to do differently? I did insist that I pay for dinner since it was technically our first “date.” Additional comments? She texted me later that night: Did you see Timothy today? I go to therapy on my own, and have always enjoyed it. There are actually statistics that show that salary increase only make people happier until basic needs of food and water are met. How do you feel about this relationship/project right now? However, when I do decide I really like someone, I am quick to jump into a relationship in order to test it out and see how it goes. Apparently, the feeling of falling in love is wired in us to help the survival of our species. I try not to look back too much and get caught up in the past, but sometimes it does unexpectedly creep back up on me. The misunderstanding and the Auto Correct drive me nuts. Between work functions and personal plans, I haven’t had a night off in over 10 days. As we were sitting in the theater waiting for the play to start, I was looking around everywhere.
This is something we’ve never discussed, although we have been flirtatious with each other in the past. Chemicals like dopamine and norepinephrine are released when in love. When I have a crazy day at work, I often forget to check my cell phone. Anyway, we went to the Off-Broadway play, Did anything interesting happen? Jessie told me some very personal stuff that’s happened in her life. Apparently she doesn’t check her texts much, which I somehow did not know. The intimate talk and the crisp spring air made our walk home feel a bit romantic. Well I certainly won’t text her if I need to get a hold of her. I think Jessie caught me looking at the Knicks score on my phone during the play.